Dear student writer,
Writing an effective manifesto is not the easiest thing to write. However, today Kay Li will be helping you by informing you about what techniques are easy for her, that will be beneficial for you all as well. First of all, when writing an effective manifesto, you must have a clear position that you are interested in writing about; it would be great if you had personal stories to incorporate into you manifesto to make it more relatable and credible. When writing a manifesto it is important to be able to have a balance between scene and summary. Yes, trying to figure out a way to balance this was quite a challenge for Kay Li, however once you do have personal stories or experiences to share, it is very easy to add scene into the manifesto to play with our senses as if we are there experiencing what Kay Li has done/ plans to do. In a manifesto, it is important to have credible information to define meanings, and further explains some of your positions. Kay Li has found it very helpful to look at .gov and .org websites, as well as the Chapman Leatherby Library sources. It is important to think about what makes your manifesto different from everyone else’s, especially like in Kay Li’s case, when trying to figure out a new way to talk about her position on organic food and eating healthy/maintaining a healthy diet and workout plan. In Kay Li’s manifesto, she has included some rhetorical questions which are very helpful when you want to audience to question themselves, and think deeper about what you are trying to inform them about. When concluding Kay Li’s manifesto, she made sure to give the readers three steps/ suggestions on what the reader can do to support her position.
One of Kay Li’s favorite manifestos would be the Slow Food Manifesto which embody many of the techniques that Kay Li has mentioned. In the slow food manifesto, they manage to give us a brief summary of the history of the Slow Food international movement, and progress to be much more descriptive with their diction as the manifesto progresses. They give us information that us readers can relate to especially when it comes to the fast food industry, and how really should pay more attention to how bad it is for us. Another important technique in this manifesto is their use of rhetorical questions close to the end to get us thinking about what we can do to support this manifesto.
What we can learn from reading some of these manifestos is how each manifesto basically uses similar techniques, but they write about it in different styles which appeal to different audiences. Although manifestos are not the easiest things to write, remember to have a clear target audience so that like Kay Li, you can make it more personalized to that audience.
From,
Kay Li
Health & Happiness 
KayLi, your “Dear Student Writer” was effective when you stated what was easiest for you as a writer and what you had trouble with. “When writing a manifesto it is important to be able to have a balance between scene and summary.” This statement is very important to bring to your readers’ attention because it a common error that people do not quite understand. I like how you were honest with us, that it was something you were working to overcome and the techniques that you used to enhance your writing such as: “however once you do have personal stories or experiences to share, it is very easy to add scene into the manifesto to play with our senses as if we are there experiencing what Kay Li has done/ plans to do.” These tips are helpful for the reader to take into account that you had a specific way to elaborate on your writing to create a scene for your audience. You also mentioned that you found it helpful to cite sources from a .gov and .org webpage which you have done in your Draft #1: “As Helpguide states, “Genetically modified organisms are plants or animals who DNA has been altered.”” You discuss that rhetorical questions also help the reader engage and question themselves, you use this in your Draft when you ask: “Were you ever curious about why organic fruits and vegetables spoiled a lot faster compared to the fruits and vegetables from supermarkets?”
Your “Dear Student Writer” accurately reflects the devices you used to further your argument in Draft 1.
Some advice: remember that some audiences may not identify with your argument because they believe organic food is too expensive, how can you persuade them to make a choice? Or provide other ways to make a healthier choice. Provide more sources to provide proof as to why organic food is “better.” To strengthen your writing , clean up sentences deleting unnecessary words such as, “I was a very active kid throughout my whole life playing a lot of different sports that helped to keep me fit.” This sentence could turn into, “Throughout my whole life, I was an active kid who played a lot of sports to stay fit.”
Just a thought! Keep up the good work!